Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The First family goes to see a Movie (A Satire)

Mom ,mom lets go for a Movie. It was a leisurely Sunday afternoon. Children had been nagging, to take them to a movie.

Thence the Madam yielded and took them to a movie in one of the several multiplexes doting in and around Delhi. As she was already late she bought the tickets and entered the hall without much enquiry. The children started howling as soon as the movie began. Lo and behold, it was a foreign movie with subtitles. They could not understand the foreign movie and started shouting "what’s this mom. We can’t understand a word of it. Lets have popcorn and leave". Madam feeling exasperated got ready to leave and approached the manager asking for a refund of the ticket money i.e,100x3=300/-.

She asked the Manager "why it was not mentioned on the ticket counter that it was a foreign movie?" Manager "it is understood that people knew about the movie when they bought the tickets. Besides there were subtitles in English and hence she and her kids should not have any difficulty in understanding". Madam said “what humiliation. Don’t you know who I am? Even the country’s top Model Mr AB endorsed that we were the Rajas. He endorses Cadbury and you accept it to be a great chocolate. When he endorsed that we are the RAJA’s why don’t you accept that too. My children did not and need not go to school. They do not know how to read and write. They are born for just one task, that’s to do RAJ over India. Have you forgotten merely a few days back my Son had clarified that 1992 Babari Fiasco would not had taken place if He or Me or My Daughter were the Prime Minister in 1992. Yet you do fail to understand that this nation has no foot to stand on, if someone from our family is not in the CEO’s seat.”

If there was no need to prepare a CV ever or appear for a job interview, what was the necessity for them to attend a SCHOOL? Anyone from our family then “सिर्फ नाम ही काफी है।” So obviously they can’t read the subtitles. And it’s not my fault alone. It’s in the family tradition. None in the previous two generation did ever graduate too. So she and her children were merely keeping up the family tradition.

Hence as the Multiplex people had not mentioned on the counter that it was a foreign movie, she was entitled to get the refund. If she and her family were not going to comprehend the movie it was imperative that she got back her Rs.300/- that she had paid for the tickets. Now a days there was no Quattrochi around to help. And you are trying to act smart with me, as I could not occupy the CEO’s seat owing to my foreign origin. My children are still rulers in the making. Once my Son gets coroneted I would ensure that the Multiplex manager and owner both meet a fate worse then Ansals.

She thundered “You are humiliating the would be CEO of the India and the could had been the CEO of M/s India, jointly. Though currently I am not the chairperson of the M/s India, yet I do possess the remote control. If you do not refund the fare it would be extremely hazardous. I would ask the Home Minister what’s his name unnnh , whatever it is, to initiate a CBI enquiry on your misappropriation of my Rs.300/-.”

The mention of Ansal’s name was enough to cook the goose of the manager. He said madam even if it’s against the management rules I would refund the Rs.300/- from my own pocket and debit it to MY EDUCATION.

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